Tuesday, October 19, 2010

You Have To Be One To Know One (Friend, that is)

Rachel Olsen is holding a devotional carnival over on her blog this week so head over and check it out.  It's sure to be encouraging to all!  The topic this month is friendship...and I couldn't think of a thing to say about it yesterday.  But today is a new day and I have been given words to say (believe it or not :-))! 

When I think about friendship, I tend to think about what it has meant negatively in my life.  You encounter all kinds of friends over the span of a lifetime.  The early friends that you drift away from as you go through school.  The friends that you make in high school that you leave behind when you go off to college.  The college friends that are there to see you at your worst (or your best-depending on your college experience).  But what kind of friend is there that will last the test of time?
I am on a (mostly) superficial friendship basis with all of the girls I've been friends with over the years.  I speak to them when I see them out and about, but have no real relationship with any of them.  I am not a person that goes out of my way to establish or maintain friendships with other people.  That's just the way I am.  My husband used to say I was antisocial.  I am glad to say that I am much better at socializing than I used to be.  But still am not very persistant about seeking people out for friendship.
As I get more invovled in the blogging communities (I never knew such a world existed) I see the importance of 'girl-friends'.  Those girls that you can hang out with and do something fun that you've never done before.  Something you just couldn't do with your husband or kids.  Like knitting.  I don't know why I have the sudden strange interest in knitting, but there it is.  Maybe it's the fact of doing something with your hands that you can say 'I made this all by myself'.  Kinda sounds like the old Shake and Bake commercial...  Anyway, that kind of friend that will tackle something ridiculous with you.  The kind that you can count on when you need a hand or an ear to talk to without judgement or opinons.  The kind of friend that will tell you the truth even when you don't want to hear it. I have friends, but no one I've let be that much in my business...know what I mean?  I have good intentions, but life gets in the way and I make that my excuse...no time for anyone other than my family.  That is just what it is....an excuse.  Relationships are hard.  You have to put forth an effort.  But what if you're rejected?  But what if you're not?
God designed us for companionship.  He created Eve for Adam as a helpmate, but also as a companion I think.  So he'd have someone to share life with (although she ended up being his downfall as well-can't have everything, I guess).  So what I'm talking myself into is going out of my way to be a friend to someone in order to build relationships.  That shouldn't be so hard.  I can do that.  I don't want this earthly life to pass by and miss out on the thing that is 'girl-time'.  You can only have so much 'husband, kid, family-time' until you start to go a little bit insane :-) (no offense to those mentioned).

'Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.'  John 15:13
'Wounds from a friend can be trusted...'  Proverbs 27:6a
'A friend loves at all times...'  Proverbs 17:17a

10 comments:

Carrie Cooper said...

Carrie @ comfortedbyGod.blogspot.com

Hi, Allison! Im visiting from BlogFrog...thank you for commenting on my Forum post. Now Ive found your great blog! I love your post on friendships. I take those very seriously. When I was extremely ill (I have an autoimmune disease) several of my friends just walked away. I still dont know what happened, but God has given me new friends. Ive learned a lot about what it means to stick with someone through thick and thin. Thanks for writing such a great post. Im following along now and look forward to getting to know you through our blogs.

Fields of gold said...

It can be scary to step out and create those friendships, huh? Sometimes I struggle with that too. Hoping you find an awesome knitting group and it evolves into super friendships!!

:) Samantha

AveryHome said...

It's a risk putting yourself out there, that's for sure, but... it's worth it. And, God will use you in a mighty way!

Coffee Junkie said...

Allison, you totally sound like me in this post. I am the exact same way. Have been all my life. I think it is the probability of rejection that causes it, some people feel it stronger than others. In my case, I put myself out there enough for others only to be left in the cold so I just don't do it anymore. Instead I blog and have made a few really wonderful connections. Good luck with the knitting thing. I'm a crochet girl myself...

Allison Morrison said...

Maybe I want to crochet...I don't even know the difference :-)

V said...

It is hard making friends and even harder keeping them. I admire your willingness to step out and give it a try. I will pray for you.

Kelli said...

Knitting Hmmm...I was recently thinking I would like to be able to do that, but I can barely sew on a button or a patch on my childs AWANA vest-oh well! I know what you mean about shying away from "friends." I used to say, "Im too busy for friends." I think that was my insecurity talking...fear of rejection maybe. No ordinary friend will do. The godly ones, the encouragers are the ones worth having!

Caroline said...

Friendships do take work, don't they? But what a beautiful thing from the effort!

Allison Morrison said...

Kelli--too bad you're in Nevada or we could knit together. Someone actually took the karate pants off my child last week and gave them to her nanny to hem (he had more pants) because I don't sew either!

Rachel Olsen said...

I love your authenticity in this post. Thank you so much for writing and linking this!

Blessings ~ Rachel